People to me, are the most interesting creatures. I enjoy seeing them and observing them every day. I never get tired of looking out the window while i am in a bus or as i walk along the streets. Each day there is a fresh bunch of new people,except the everyday familiar faces. It never gets old for me. I am not much of a talker and most times you will find me doing the listening and observing. This has proved a useful tool for me, for with time i have come to learn words are very meaningless and so i keep mine to an absolute necessary minimum. Instead i focus on the true message that is the body language.
In my short days on earth i have observed something that i call the undesirable element. I look at people walk around as if they have no care in the world. They are all beautiful women and handsome men as you observe them from the outside. I always let out a small laugh when i ask someone, “How are you today?” and they answer “i am fine”. This to me is cliché and far from the truth in some cases.
I see the ladies walk down the streets of Nairobi looking truly glam and if Giulianna Rancic saw them, would say her favourite “flawless”.In a split second i see a fidgety posture. The men on the other hand walk with assurance and quick strides. At a corner i see, a man receive a phone call and see him sigh deeply. I see a mother with two children side by side crossing the streets towards the restaurant and the children laugh as they enjoy their packet of fries. The mother looks away into a distance as if she is in another world.
The matatu touts seem like very happy people and always make my day when they dance vigorously to the loud music as if with no care. I wish i was such a free spirit. In another moment one is quiet, as he looks at a passenger rudely insult them for forgetting to give their change back. The tone of voice is really demeaning i must say. I could go on and on.
“A penny for thoughts ma’am?” “No?” “How about you sir?” How i wish i could read people’s thoughts to know their true state of affairs. To see their true selves for this after all is the real person. Instead what i see is cool, calm and collected people who have learned to hide their undesirable elements far away in their minds and hearts. All their worries neatly tucked away and instead showing you their smile even when they dying inside.They say i am fine even as they push back their tears.
The lady behind that pretty dress and make up is a person battling with self esteem and despite being beautiful she believes none of it even when told. A mother frustrated by her husband or work, a man full of insecurities and inadequacies. A matatu driver who constantly feels looked down upon, for the choice of career while that was the best he could do for the time.
A young faithful girl who has just been left by her boyfriend and feels like her world has come to an end. A man being pressed for school fees and rent and not knowing where to find it. A street boy who sees the clock strike 6pm remembering, he has to sleep yet again in the cold streets of Nairobi. A Christian who is so passionately in love with God and yet always finds himself or herself falling and feeling as if they are the only ones struggling.
Oh people, how my heart goes out to all of us. How perfect we are in hiding this undesirable element from the world. To the world, we sing, dance, shout, laugh at the top of our voices and walk pretty, down the streets as if oblivious of these undesirable elements. After all we don’t want the world to know. What would they think of us? I don’t want to look weak in front of my peers or vague or poor or shy or not good enough or fearful or so many other things we don’t want the world to see. And so it is with this i pray to God on behalf of my friends the prayer for the undesirable element.
I don’t know all of the challenges my friends have, but you know everything. I hear their silence, you hear their prayers. I see their laughter, you see their tears. I see when they give, you see what has been taken away from them. I see their beautiful appearance, you see the scars in their souls. I experience their faith, you know their doubts. My prayer for them Lord is that you may give them everything they need and heal their hearts from all they are hurting from. AMEN.”